Confession 66: God Does Not Throw Pity Parties

I was driving to work this morning. It was raining, again. It was dark. It was Thursday. Stephen was up in the middle of the night playing, again. The end result of which he was tired and cranky this morning. Between the two boys and myself, I’m not sure there was one moment before I left the house this morning where someone was not throwing a fit. On top of it, I’ve developed an obnoxious head cold which has left me even more run down, cranky and achy. So, on my dreary, wet, cold drive to work this morning, I decided to have a nice little pity party. I was mad and frustrated with everything, feeling overwhelmed. I was about to yell out to God, “I’m too tired for this!” when I heard a song playing on my morning radio station (90.7 K-Love “pahwsitive” Christian Music”). It was a Mark Schultz song about a mother praying over a son who is seriously ill. The DJ came on afterward to say that the song was written for some friends of Schultz’s whose son had been battling cancer but was now in remission.

Let me tell you, I felt that God was whacking me over the head with that one. “Hey, Pity-Party-Patty–snap out of it!! There will be no pity parties on my watch! Get it together, girl. We’ve got a full day ahead. And don’t talk to me about being tired. You don’t even know tired yet! Be thankful you got to play with your son, even if it was at 3 A.M. Your children are gifts. Enjoy them. And why are you getting stressed out anyway? Don’t you know by now that I’ve got you covered? Forget tired. Forget frustrated. Forget rising blood pressure. Focus on me. I’ve walked the path ahead of you. Trust me, I know where we’re going. “

After that, I managed to get out of my head for a little while and really focus on the world around me. I focused on Garrett, talking to me continuously about riding to school in Stephen’s car seat. I focused on my lessons, and on the students I would be interacting with shortly. I focused on the music, praising God for the rainy, dreary day to live.

Blessings and Peace,