The Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands. He has watched over your journey through this vast wilderness. Deuteronomy 2:7

These past few weeks, I have been in an M-O-O-D.  Instead of feeling positive and upbeat, I find myself frustrated and irritable and frustrated and irritable at the fact that I feel frustrated and irritable.  I think there are several factors behind this and I get that our emotions are just emotions and we choose how we respond to them.  But sometimes, I just want someone to say, “I understand exactly how you’re feeling.”  I also want them to say, “Here is definitively what you should do to get your positive mojo back.”  That never happens.

I know that many people out there have these amazing, clear as a mountain stream moments of spiritual epiphany where God sends out a message with trumpets blaring and there is an LED spotlight pointing straight to the path they should take.  I am not one of those people.

In my own personal faith journey, God seems more inclined to lead me through overgrown, unmarked forest paths that intertwine and wrap around and cross over mud bottomed streams full of catfish which I don’t even like to eat.  It’s irritating.  (Did I mention I’ve been in an M-O-O-D?)  And as much as I whine and complain and show just how much of a spoiled ungrateful child I am, God continues to stand resolute, arms crossed over his expansive chest saying, “You’re just gonna have to keep slogging through, baby.” 

You see, one of the things I believe is that God is much more interested in the “what” of who we are than the “where”.  God wants to make sure our life journey leads us closer and closer to Him.  Therefore, He’s willing to let us slog it out in muddy streams and overgrown paths in order to complete the great and perfect work in us He has begun.  And not only is God willing to let us slog it out, He will patiently stand before us and wait while we (I) dig our (my) heels into the muddy bank and get our (my) full stubborn on.

In the same way I work to outlast my stubborn as a mule 5 year old, so God, with infinitely more patience and gentleness, outlasts me.

“I’m not moving,” I say.

“Okay,” God replies.

“You can’t make me,” I say.

“That’s fine,” God replies.

“Seriously, I’m done with this,” I say.

“Then be done with it,” God replies.  “But I’ll be waiting on the other side.”

And that’s it, because God knows—He KNOWS—that regardless of how long I choose to sit on that muddy shore pouting, I will eventually pull myself up and slog on through.  And I will do this because no matter how crazy and complicated and irritating the path seems, I believe—I BELIEVE—in God’s plan for my life.

I believe that He sees the bigger, eternal picture of things.  I believe that He is working right now not only on my future, but on the future of my children and grandchildren and great grandchildren.  There are things coming together right now that I will never see—things that I cannot comprehend or or know but that will matter someday down the line of legacy.

And so, regardless of an M-O-O-D, I keep slogging on through trusting that one day, God will let me see the map.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,  fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.  Hebrews 12:1-3

 

24 grams of carbs.  A 52 on the Glycemic Index which only goes up to 100.  Bananas.  No really, I’m talking about bananas.  The bright yellow half-moon shaped fruit that is rich and creamy and satisfying, especially with a tablespoon of peanut butter or Nutella.  My favorite snack these past several weeks has betrayed my sense of food trust.  As I stared at the numbers in bold black type I wanted to cry out in my best Dr. Doofenshmirtz voice, “Curse you bananas!!”  (If you don’t understand the Dr. D reference, talk to a child—preferably one with whom you have a healthy relationship and are friendly with their parents.)

You see, over the past couple of weeks my weight has hovered about a pound and a half over my “acceptable range” limit.  I know you’re probably thinking to yourself, “Seriously?  A pound and a half?  So what?”  The “so what” for me is that over the past year I have worked hard to lose over 50 pounds.  And when my weight goes over my “acceptable range”, I get a little panicked.  The skinny girl within me fought hard for this victory, and she’s not letting the fat girl out of the headlock without a pretty good fight!

Of course, I can’t blame it all on bananas.  It was probably more the pumpkin cheesecake, pumpkin yogurt and pumpkin scones I’ve enjoyed over the past week that really edged the scale up. (Hmmm….. do you sense a pattern?)  Oh, and the Red Apple Ales I drank.  I deeply apologize if you’re a tea-totaler, but I like to think that Jesus wasn’t opposed to popping open a cold one with the disciples after a particularly strenuous day of ministry.

All kidding aside, I have to confess that sometimes I get tired of working to make healthy choices day in and day out.  Sometimes, instead of passing on the potatoes, I just want to slam my hand down on the table and yell, “Pass the potatoes, NOW!!!!”  Sometimes I want a break from conscious living.  And some days, that transfers over to my faith life as well.

There are times when living a life of faith wears me out.  I don’t want to do what God has on the agenda for today.  I’m tired of “blooming where I’m planted”, working hard to maintain a positive attitude, finding the God-moments in the midst of the everyday mess.  Sometimes, instead of trying to see the other side, to empathize with those who are struggling, I just want to say, “You know what, life is hard.  Deal with it and move on.”

When confronted with a negative, egotistical or mean person I would like to not model Christ-like behavior and instead simply say, “I don’t like you.  I’m not going to like you.  Don’t talk to me anymore.”

Some days, my selfish, judgmental, hypocritical, uncaring nature kicks into overdrive and I’d rather lay on the couch binging out on Hallmark movies and dessert than doing the work God has placed before me.

But here’s what I love, and I mean LOVE about the Lord My God.  His grace is infinitely big enough to cover up all of my absolute failures as a human being.  In fact, when I fall off the healthy food bandwagon, God doesn’t come to me and rub my nose into the extra pound or so flashing on the scale, ranting and raving like some overzealous personal trainer.  Instead, he quietly whispers to my heart a message of grace and redemption.

This is a life-long journey, He says to me.  It’s the culmination of healthy choices made over a lifetime that really counts.  Don’t beat yourself up.  Just keep working toward our goal of living a healthy lifestyle.

Likewise, when I feel fed up with living out the Call to show God’s love to those I meet on a daily basis, God doesn’t typically give me the swift kick in the gluteus maximus I deserve.  Instead, God gives me a quiet place to rest my mind.  He offers up time and space for me to focus on Him, to feel His presence, to renew and re-energize and refocus.

This is a life long journey, He says to me.  It’s the culmination of choosing to follow the path which I lead you down over the course of your lifetime that really counts.  Just keep looking to Me.  Come to Me, talk to Me, rest in Me.  Keep working toward our goal of living a life that reflects My Love and Grace.  Just keep trying.  I am with you, every step of the way.

I am humbled by the Grace and Mercy our Creator has for me.  I am convicted by His steadfast devotion.  I am moved by his Strength to get up and keep going.  And I am hopeful, because of His Perfect Love that I will one day hear Him say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Wishing you God’s Amazing Grace today.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

P.S. Congratulations to Tina from Christian Joy Creations for winning the giveaway!!  Not only is she an amazing woman of God, she is also my personal health coach and has taught me much about the power of a journey!!

I have to confess, I don’t always enjoy motherhood.  There are days when I just want to throw my hands into the air, yell “Done!” and drive off to a fancy hotel where I can throw out the Do Not Disturb sign and snuggle down between crisply starched sheets that I didn’t wash.  Parenting is hard, especially in our current culture.  There are so many other voices and vices vying for the attention of our children.  There’s way too much information available about parenting tricks and techniques that one can easily get lost in.  There’s the lovely gift of social media which allows us to instantly compare ourselves to the sunny happy family pictures posted by our friends.  And never, does it seem, has there been so much at stake.

But then there are those moments, the wonder moments I like to call them, where the beauty and wonder and joy and thanksgiving of parenting all come together in one time and place and I find myself thinking, “This is good.  We are okay.”

I had one of those wonder moments the other night as we were driving home from the grocery store.  If you are a parent, the mere mention of children and grocery store together are enough to make you say, “ugh.”  If you are not a parent, borrow a friend’s children and take them to the grocery store.  Trust me, she won’t mind!!

As we were driving home, the boys were, as my 7 year old would say, “sitting on my nerves”.  I was done with the incessant chatter, silly voices, constant questioning and, in general, with hearing the word “Mommy” in any tone of voice.  In a moment of sheer inspiration (desperation) I put in one of our favorite Christian CD’s.  A minute later my irritation had been transposed into sheer joy as the boys and I had a little car jam to a new version of “This Is My Father’s World”.  Nothing melts my heart quite like hearing those two little voices raised in praise to God.

Five minutes of praise in the midst of irritation became a wonder moment.  And instead of saying, “God, help me” I found myself saying, “God, thank you.  Thank you for the beautiful gift of these children.  And thank you for the great honor of being their mother.”

I live for the wonder moments, when  God steps in through the midst of the noise, chaos and dysfunction of this world and reminds me that I don’t need to run away.  I just need to look to Him.

And now, the real reason you’re reading this post: A GIVEAWAY!!!!  In honor of my 300th article, I am giving away to one lucky reader a copy of Elizabeth George’s book, A Mom After God’s Own Heart: 10 Ways to Love Your Children.  Here’s a brief summary.  It’s beautiful.

A Mom After God’s Own Heart
	In A Mother After God’s Own Heart, Elizabeth George offers 10 principles to help moms make God an everyday part of their children’s lives. Whether your kids are young or grown, you will learn how to:  Teach your children God’s Word. Train them in God’s ways. Talk to your children about Jesus. Pray with and for them. Elizabeth is the mother of two grown children and six grandchildren. She gives practical advice and real-life suggestions for helping children, no matter what their ages, to incorporate God into daily life. Elizabeth’s husband, Jim, also provides biblical advice from a dad’s perspective. This book makes a great study resource for personal reflection, mom’s small groups, and a wonderful birthday or baby shower gift for new moms. For additional encouragement and growth, check out the accompanying devotional and study guide.

– See more at: http://www.elizabethgeorge.com/books/a-mom-after-gods-own-heart/#sthash.hjOJkWok.dpuf

With the book comes a beautiful clay scented cross which you can hang in your car/bathroom/cubicle/wherever with a special blessing for mothers tied around it.

So, here’s how you get it:

1. Follow my blog=3 tickets

2. Leave a comment= 2 tickets

3. Share this post=2 tickets

4. Like this post=1 ticket

If I were really on top of things I’d have some interactive sign-up thing.  But, I’m not.  So, choose your tickets, I’ll put them into a pretty glass bowl and will draw out a winner on Tuesday.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

Come to me, all you who are weary, and I will give you REST.  Matthew 11:28

 As a working mom, most of my days are pretty full.  I get up in the mornings in mom mode–make lunches, get children dressed, make coffee, arrange for some sort of semi-nutritional breakfast…you know the drill.

Then I get to work where I promptly move into teacher mode.  This includes frantically getting copies made, books located and a “plan” in place for the 11 groups of students I meet with throughout the course of the day.

After a brief respite on my drive home I am back into mom mode, with pick-ups, homework, piano practice and dinner.

After the kids are in bed and asleep I enter into wife mode, which usually consists of sitting in the living room with my husband and watching shows we’ve recorded on the DVR and stumbling off to bed after The Daily Show ends at 10:30.

So when an author who will remain nameless suggests in his book about pursuing your dreams that one of the keys to dream achievement is “hustle”, I want to drop the book down the garbage disposal.  Obviously, this guy does not live in the land of working motherhood!  Like most other women I know, I don’t have anymore hustle to give.  And honestly, I don’t know that I would give it if I had it.

One of the sad truths about our American life is that we’ve manipulated the concept of hard-work so that it has become an idol of busyness.  We like the “hustle”, regardless of how much we protest it.  There’s a certain adrenaline rush that comes from being busy.  There’s a high that comes from shoving 36 hours of activity into a 24 hour day.  We feel like we are conquerors in some epic life battle.

We run from one scheduled activity to the next, max ourselves out on projects with tight deadlines, sign up for any and every committee that’s being offered.  And we do this because, deep down, we think being busy gives our life meaning.  The more we “hustle” the more we are achieving.  And achieving, in our culture, means success.

And yet, God’s design for our lives could not be more different.  God doesn’t want us to “hustle” through our lives.  Rather, God says come to me.  Sit quietly in my presence.  Find your rest in my peace.  Be still.  Know me.  Listen.  Wait.

In repentance and REST is your salvation; in quietness and trust is your strength.  But you would have none of it.  Isaiah 30:15

 

When Jesus came to visit the house of Mary, Martha and Lazarus, he didn’t praise Martha for running around like a chicken with her head cut off (as my mother would say) trying to make a perfect dinner for these unexpected guests.  Rather, he praised her sister, Mary, who did nothing but sit and listen to him speak.

God doesn’t want us running around until our heads spin.  God wants us still, at His feet, listening to His Word, communing with Him.  God hardwired our brains for connection; connection with other human beings and connection with Him.  And when we get caught up in the “hustle”, we miss those connections.

And so, I say with the Psalmist:

Return to your REST, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.  Psalm 116:7

May you find REST today.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

Our temporary minor problems are producing an eternal stockpile of glory for us that is beyond all comparison. We don’t focus on the things that can be seen but on the things that can’t be seen. The things that can be seen don’t last, but the things that can’t be seen are eternal.  2 Corinthians 4:17-18 (CEB)

Two little white sweater vests.  Two little white sweater vests with corduroy pants and sneakers on feet running gleefully through the park.  Two little white sweater vests side by side, so close they almost touch; with corduroy pants and sneakers on feet running gleefully through the park.  Two little white sweater vests, and a mother’s heart that is melting in the beauty of the moment.

For this time is fleeting, the Spirit reminds me.  They are not yours to keep.

And so I close my eyes, basking in the warmth of the sun, thanksgiving flowing out from my soul.  The light and momentary troubles of parenting fade away before the two little white sweater vests with corduroy pants and sneakers on feet running gleefully through the park.  Thank you,  is the prayer I offer as I imprint the image in my mind of my two sons running together in their little white sweater vests.

They will not be mine forever.  They will grow older, more independent.  They will move on from me to create lives and families of their own.

They are not yours to keep.

And yet, there is so much more to do.  So many more lessons to be taught, so many more foundations to pour, so much more love cover them in.  There are tempers to tame, habits to create, voices to encourage and hearts to nurture.  There is faith left to build and character to develop.  Because, they are not mine to keep.

But today–today is a day for gratitude.  Today is a day of Sabbath from the light and momentary troubles of parenting.  Today is a day to marvel at the wonder of God’s creations.  Today is a day to watch the profound beauty of two little white sweater vests with corduroy pants and sneakers on feet running gleefully through the park.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

Confession 297: An Attitude Adjustment.

Yesterday, I needed an attitude adjustment.  The day before at work I had reached my frustrational limit.  I was D-O-N-E!  So what happens when you’re a working mom and frustrated at work?  I am ashamed to say that, for me, I come home and am frustrated with my kids.  And when I am frustrated with them, their behavior only gets worse.  Instead of proactively parenting, I go into reactive mode.  Instead of trying to teach them why swinging around on the freezer door handle is dangerous, I just snap and grab them off of it–probably yelling “knock it off!!” in the process.  And the more irritated I get, the wilder they seem to be.

When we finally got them to go to sleep, at almost midnight, I knew that something had to give.  “God,” I said.  “I cannot have another day like today.”  It was abundantly clear to me that in order to not have another day like this, I would have to adjust my attitude.  And to adjust my attitude, I needed some divine inspiration.

God says to us that when we seek Him we shall find Him.  How true this has been in my life!!  I gave God my D-O-N-E day.  I prayed for renewal and a sense of peace.  I prayed that God would take the frustration from me and help me to focus in on doing what He has called me to do.  I went to work carrying this in my heart:

The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary.  He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being taught.  Isaiah 50:4

Here is the truth as I know it in my life.  When I take time to still myself before the Lord.  When I listen to the teachings of the Holy One and delve into the Word which was and is and always will be, God helps me to see things in a new perspective.  His Wisdom takes away the clouds of frustration that can surround my mind and my heart.  He reminds me of His Purpose, of His Power, of His Love.

I walked into work yesterday with a song in my heart.  I was positive, upbeat and re-energized for my day.  And it wasn’t because I had flipped some mental switch, gotten a good night’s sleep, ate a good breakfast, etc…. It was because I spent time before the Throne of the Most High.  It was because I gave my burdens up to One much more capable than me.  I let God be God.  I gave Him Sovereignty over my being.

Don’t get me wrong–I’m no Pollyanna.  And God doesn’t come in and just magically wave his wand like some sort of eternal Albus Dumbledore and sweep all of my problems and frustrations away.  He does, however, (and did) give me a better spirit in which to encounter it all.  And so, I can say with the Psalmist:

In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.  Psalm 5:3

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

I will not boast about myself, except about my weaknesses.  Even if I should choose to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will think more of me than is warranted by what I do or say,  or because of these surpassingly great revelations. Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.  Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.  But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.                    2 Corinthians 12:6-10

111 pitches.  That was the pitch count last night for St. Louis Cardinals rookie pitcher Michael Wacha in the top of the 9th inning with no hits against him.  111 pitches and 2 outs.  111 pitches and 1 out away from becoming only the 12th pitcher in St. Louis Cardinals history to pitch a no hitter.  111 pitches.  And then came pitch 112.  As Wacha released the throw the ball soared smack into the bat of the opposing hitter.  Pitch 112 soared over the head of Wacha, his glove grazing the ball as he stretched his arm, trying to stop the ball from hitting the ground.  But, to no avail.  Pitch 112 was a hit.  The no-hitter was missed by no more than an inch.  112 pitches.  What a difference one pitch makes!! 

It’s kind of like that in life sometimes, isn’t it?  Everything seems to be coming together, dreams seem an inch within reach.  And then, there’s pitch 112.  The promotion you were sure of went to someone else.  The contract on your dream house falls through.  You get yet another rejection letter.  You find yourself throwing up in the bathroom behind the sanctuary on Christmas Eve.  Oh wait, that’s only in my family!!

The point is, life happens.  Plans go awry.  And it can hurt–a lot.  Kind of like a thorn in your side.  And like Paul, in those moments when it all seems to fall apart, we need to remember that God’s grace is enough.  Our failures and mistakes and disappointments are okay.  In fact, they’re perfect.  They’re an opportunity for God to step in and show His glory and majesty.  They’re an opportunity for God to show His strength, and for us to experience His love in a magnificently remarkable way.  God shines on pitch 112.

For the record, Michael Wacha didn’t view pitch 112 as a failure.  With a shrug and a big smile he said, “I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.”  For him, 8 and 2/3 innings of no hits was a great game.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

Okay, I know it’s Tuesday.  But, I’m always a little late and the blessings remain the same!  The Acts 2 life is what I strive for, both personally and for our churches.

Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day.  They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.  Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common.  They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need.  Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.  Acts 2: 41-47

This passage of Scripture comes just after the miracle of Pentecost, the day the Holy Spirit fell upon the disciples and allowed them to proclaim the message of Jesus Christ in many different language.  Over 3,000 people were baptized into the Fellowship of Believers that day and a new community was established.  The early Christians were a small renegade band of citizens, defying both Jewish and Roman authority to actively practice their faith.  They couldn’t do it independently.  They needed and greatly depended on one another.

Throughout his missionary journeys the apostle Paul always lived in communion with those he ministered to.  He worked side by side with fellow believers, helping them earn their daily bread.  He stayed in their homes, shared their food, bolstered their faith.  Paul was ministered to by those he came to serve as much as he ministered to him.

To me, this is what true Christian Fellowship should look like.  We, as a unified body of believers, come together and share what we have in order to spread God’s Word of Love and Peace to those in our communities.  We stand together, helping each other along the way.  If someone in our community is lacking, then we should step up and offer what we can in order to meet that need.

Our journey in this life is not one of isolation.  We are surrounded by others along the way.  We need to embrace mutuality in our relationships with others.  That’s what an Acts 2 life represents-mutuality.  It’s about seeing others as equal partners, regardless of their gender, political beliefs, ethnic heritage or sexual preference.  It’s understanding that we are part of something bigger and better than this temporal life.  We are Kingdom dwellers.  And that Kingdom has been created to last a lifetime.

The apostle John said that believers in Christ would be recognized by their ability to love.  To me, that love he speaks of is an active love.  We love others when we meet them where they are.  We love others when we give of ourselves to them.  And we love others because God, in His infinite Love and Mercy came down to his Creation and gave us what we needed.

Acts 2 living is my goal.  I’m not there yet.  I’ve got more work to do in order to get out of my “me” bubble.  I’m not always thoughtful, considerate or even open to others.  I go into isolation and self-preservation mode sometimes.  But God’s work is not finished in my life yet.  And so I will look to Him, the Author and Perfecter of my faith, to help me move more fully into living an Acts 2 life.

To see an Acts 2 life in person, go to my friend Amy Sullivan.  Amy dedicated her family to a year of living an Acts 2 life.  They focused on giving to others in everything they did.  And now, a few years later, Amy has grown quite a ministry and is publishing her first book on living generously this coming Spring.

Blessings and Peace,

Sara

Then Job replied to the Lord: